Now that the warring lunatic oligarchs are reaching out to the moon again, astronomers are considering a standard time zone for the moon. The goal is to “streamline contact among the many countries”.

Why? Astronomers have been using one time and date system for centuries, and computers use one time and date. Giving the moon its own natural ‘sundial’ time will be out of sync with both existing systems and won’t add any convenience.

When Holy Lord Bezos establishes his lunar empire, he will declare Bezos Standard Time, which will be based on Holy Lord Bezos’s whims. Until then, just use the stardate.

The more interesting question is how plants and animals will sync with the moon when living ON the terraformed moon. It’s logically impossible. Many living things, including humans, time their reproductive patterns by the moon. The patterns will try to continue, but will go astray without phaselocking from the real tidal pull.

Later thought: The pull BY the earth as felt on the moon is vastly larger than the pull BY the moon as felt on the earth. The earth obviously doesn’t transit across the sky, but the apogee – perigee cycle will vary the pull. So there’s still a monthly up and down, with a slightly different period and a much stronger baseline. If living things are relying on the strength of the pull, they’ll handle it. If they’re relying on the position and angle of the pull, they’ll be lost.

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And speaking of full moon:

800 West 3rd, Reported male on fire. Officer on scene with the male and has the fire knocked down. Medical response en route. Reported male has multiple layers of clothing and lit the outside layer on fire. Male declined medical treatment and stated he didn’t get burned.