Via Cointelegraph, Trump is strongly favoring the insane idea of a Bitcoin Strategic Reserve. As I’ve mentioned a few thousand times already, bitcoin is just a database or spreadsheet. One bitcoin is one row of a spreadsheet.
There’s nothing original about strategic reserves. Birds do it, bees do it, even educated cells do it. People and businesses and governments have been storing commodities or money for thousands of years. It’s the best way to keep civilization going, even though we’ve largely abandoned all forms of storage to enable total control by Bets and Debts.
The Bitcoin Reserve is truly original. Nobody ever thought of storing rows of a chart or database in case we should run out of rows**. But what if computers fail? How would we get access to our own rows if the computers were all down following an alien invasion and Y2K attack by toy drones? Scary heart-pumping thought!
Never fear! I have developed a unique and original way of creating a Bitcoin Store for Strategic Purposes.
I mined 10 Bitcoins on paper with a pen. The first pen happened to run out of ink during Date, just to make the Y2K scenario more realistic, so I found another pen to complete the headings. I will apply for a patent on Pen Mining. It’s far more environmental than using the entire output of a power company to mine Bitcoin!
According to the ticker on Cointelegraph, one Bitcoin is currently $99,673, so you can own this Set Of Ten Bitcoins for the bargain price of $996,730 if you BUY NOW! But maybe I should charge extra for the middle rows where my artistic curve cleverly allowed more room for Precious Info.
But what if all pens run out of ink and all paper disappears? I have another fantastically clever idea up my sleeve. I will draw the spreadsheet on sand with a stick for an extra $5 million.
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Polistra's Mill 